back to chapter one

2011's almost over, its the end of year, and im asking myself, what have I been doing for the past 1 year? learning making cakes? yes! its a year full of cakes. and its just the start of my never ending journey!

life has been boring. cakes everyday. similar designs everyday which makes it even more boring. well lately ive spent like most of the money ive earned and i regret few things i bought. and my feeling is messed up and stuff, sometimes I even wonder. what is my purpose of living?

And lately, a glimpse part of my life this year tickles me. Hyatt, yes i miss it so damn freakin much. havent been in a good mood lately, and Ive went there like twice a week this month. I keep on recalling my fading memories there. but lately im missing the people there. Well, the old trainees, my superb trainee-mates. the new ones dont really intrigue me much as for me i think they have a serious attitude problems. well, i miss all of the staffs there, well, i miss every inch of my life there!

It's late night and i'm here in front of my laptop asking my self how come 6 months flew by that fast? I really wish this life does have a remote control which I could press rewind. I wish I could re-do this whole 6 months training thing, back to March 1 2011.

It's been a great honor to be trained at Grand Hyatt, one of the top 3 hotel in Jakarta! I didn't realize how lucky I was to be given the chance to work there, not until these last few months.


Being able to be trained there is almost as exciting as getting a golden ticket to Charlie's chocolate factory! indeed it is!

March.
A chapter which is prefaced with tears and laughter.

March 1 2011, orientation day. shameful, friendless, hyped, sad and shocked. I was late for orientation day, I didnt have any friends to accompany me, the only Trisakti student is me, I ate lunch alone, saying to Cheryl i'm okay while I was pretty lonely. yes, friendless indeed! got bored with lots of videos, searching through the entire orientation room for other pastry trainees. and yes, that's the first time I met Sarah!
March 2, 2011. day one of training. My first ever job was to make the versatile double chocolate cookies! I got myself Pak Alwi as my mentor, and Sarah got Pak AA as hers! Lesson learned is that I have to make the cookies with exact size! Size does matter! ;) and hello kak Citrawati, Jose and Gery!
March 3, 2011. First time meeting Pak Apit and kak sisy the stove girl haha :') and I'm in spanish peanut butter cookies madness, the scrumptious cookies which is too, Sultan Brunei's favorite!
March 4, 2011. first time meeting kak Maria, she got hospitalized and taraaaa! welcome back to the teamclove! :D
and there it goes, day by day, making cookies, rounding it one by one, being stuck in the chocolate room making Black Forest cookie which was a total disaster as it was overmixed! yet it was a lovely cookie tho! and i like it so much! nyum!

somewhere in the middle of March, I actually cried a few times, I felt lonely, I had no one to talk to as the others were still strangers, I had no one to lean on, I felt jealous with others as I thought im not loveable enough, well, it was all a total bizarre!

And now, in the middle of December, I keep on regretting how come I took it for granted? my chance to be trained in Grand Hyatt. its just like that! i have new friends though now. lovely "family" yet, we're separated now! I guess im just feeling lonely these days. and the troubles i got lately, I just feel like dying inside. I guess aside from being lonely, im depressed too. and no, im not into Christmas celebration. im lost.