It is sometimes

Himym

Hello there 28/10/2015

Another update about ming ming and the days. Today's not about depression which is a yeay.

I feel happy. I feel bad, i feel horrible but im happy. Yes, really sure im happy today. 

Despite being tired, being fat as shit but i still can sit down and write that im happy. Its like i know im not as lucky as lots of people, but the unfortunate events have made me what i am right now. Hardworker, crazy, diligent, restless girl.

I just knew i can be considered as the most hardworking girl at my age. And im getting the appreciation of my hardwork.

Money, fame, well its not that those are what matters most, but its fun to get those.

So here i am, 00:22 lying on my bed, thinking about how tired i am but happy. Yes, happy. Tho im pretty sure it wont last long but meh why not embrace it while you have it? Haha goodnight people xx

Mingmonglie and the depression days

Tired. As fuck.

I am currently back in the days where i feel lost, i dont know who to talk to, i want to post the quote on ig, but sounds so week.

Huh; since when do i have to wear a mask? Feeling so low, lost. Really lost. Nothings changing, same ol same ol.

Tired. Cant sleep. 1:23 in the morning and im already awaken. That bad, huh?

Wont really say im sad, but i cant say im trully happy. Lost. Really really lost.

Anton

Dear bapak Anton Junior che, percaya ga percaya, susah banget yaoloh bales comment lo via iphone. I just cant reach the comment section. Anyway, thank you masbroh for reading, and keeping it low.

Its nice to know that you still care masih mau tau mingmingmingmong masih idup ato ngak. Ah here i am, udah melewati my depressed days, skrg jadi lebih brutal. I curse a lot. Hahhaa tp dari dulu jg curse a lot lol

I hope youre doing fine! We still have long long long looooongggg way to go, yeah? Udah ah gw ngantuk. Oke bye!

Before it fades

Like it or not, memory fades away, before i forgot about the small details, im just gonna write it down.

The beginning, of the end.

To feel deeply about everything, is both a blessing and a curse.

And i dont know whether to feel happy or sad. For sure im feeling both, strongly. You readers mustve known that i went through a lot, i worked so hard to be where i am right now. Youre born either lucky or either a fighter. I wasnt born with the priveledge to ask for something, i have to work to get it.

And for the last 2 weeks, my life, it was perfect. I feel happy, overwhelmed, i feel like God and the universe were really nice. Like they let me reap all the good fortune after all my hardwork.

Day 1, to be continued (i gotta go down to my kitchen and start working! danggg!!6

Monday

Its that new beginning every single week, sometimes i feel good about mondays cos in doing the job that i like (and get paid fucking lot)

But todays not the day. Today's just the day that i wanna sleep. I dont want this anymore. Im fucking tired i just wish my parents are rich as fuck and i dont have to go through these shit in order to live by.

Happy Monday!

I felt happy

I am back in Jakarta, back to the routine. And i am ....... Sad.

Korea bound

Somewhere in this road, i felt cold, my legs were shaky, i cant feel my nose. But i felt happy.

Its like a whole new world, a whole new feeling i have never felt before. Everything feels different, i felt happy even when i didnt try.

Every morning, a brand new journey awaits, a new world is waiting for me to explore. A step to something i dont even know. I got lost a lot, but inside it feels familiar, like a place you can call home.

A way to endless journey. I remember buying milk every morning from the vending machine. It was real, but why does it feel like a dream?

Like i was asleep for 6 days and i went to my own wonderland, where i only found joy, excitement and happiness.

And now after im back, i feel lost. I dont want to wake up from this dream. I dont want to to back to reality.

20.03.15 and

Tired. I think you must be bored reading my blog. Its all about me complaining again and again and again and again and again and again.

There are times when i dont know who to talk to, thats when i come here. And write to you. Believe me, i dont know who you are (maybe i do but nah i dont have any clue who still reads this blog)

Its kinda like you want the world to know, and at the same time, you dont want anyone to know.

Human, such a weird creature.

Hot and cold

I think i got a bipolar. I dont know, too many mood swings, not because of pms for sure. Something is just not right. Im happy and in a minute im sad. Is it normal? Wouldnt really say in having depression right now, lifes been good to me, but something is still missing. Like im sad for small reasons. Blah